The Blair Witch Project YYH STYLE!
by Agi
Summary: Whew...haven't written in a while waves to all who remember her Well anyway, this is my newest creation, a YYH parody of The Blair Witch Project...MWAHA! XD


** The Blair Witch Project YYH STYLE!  **   
  
  
  
** Disclaimer **   
  
I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, The Blair Witch Project, or clam chowder.   
  
  
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Whoa. Haven't written anything in a while. Just posted this to let everyone know I'm still alive ^.^;;; I was gonna put this in my other fic, "Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales" (which WILL be updated...someday...), but since it's not really a fairy tale, I decided to separate it. This fic is the result of everything that built up in the four months I haven't updated. I had to give my head a chance to deflate ^^   
  
  
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Agi: *plays with the zoom button on the camera* big...small...BIG...SMALL...   
  
Yusuke: *eats clam chowder* Mmmm...chowdery...   
  
Kuwabara: Urameshi! Why are you eating glue?   
  
Yusuke: It's clam chowder!   
  
Kuwabara: GLUE!   
  
Yusuke: CHOWDER!   
  
Kuwabara: ARMADILLO! *grabs the clam chowder and throws it in the recycling bin*   
  
Yusuke: NOOO! *looks into the bin* WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! You're not supposed to recycle clam chowder!   
  
Kuwabara: Uhh...why?   
  
Yusuke: 'Cause one day it'll come back as toilet paper or stained glass or something!   
  
Kuwabara: Hmm...isn't that the stuff they make church windows out of?   
  
Yusuke: Yes Kuwabara, church windows are made out of stained glass.   
  
Kuwabara: No, I meant toilet paper.   
  
Yusuke: -_-;;;;   
  
Agi: *turns camera off* Hey...where are Kurama and Hiei?   
  
Yusuke: Did you check the recycling bin?   
  
Agi: *looks through the recycling bin* Hmm...there's some prosthetic body parts, a beehive, some nuclear sludge, and princess in here...*GASP!* WHO RECYCLED THE CLAM CHOWDER?!   
  
Kuwabara: I did your Honor...   
  
Agi: You're not supposed to recycle clam chowder!!   
  
Kuwabara: ...........   
  
Kurama: Hey...so when are we actually gonna start the "fic"?   
  
Kuwabara: Ahh! It's Kurama's ghost!   
  
Hiei: Hn...moron...   
  
Kuwabara: EEEK! And phantom Hiei!   
  
Kurama & Hiei: o_O   
  
Agi: Where have you guys been?   
  
Hiei: We were here the whole time, but we're just so ninja-like that we blend right into the walls.   
  
Agi: .........k.   
  
Kurama: ^_^   
  
Kuwabara: Oh well...Shorty would have made a good newspaper...   
  
Hiei: *lights Kuwabara on fire*   
  
Yusuke: So umm...what are we doing here?   
  
Hiei: If this is another one of your pathetic attempts at a humor fic...   
  
Agi: Shhhh...   
  
Hiei: ¬.¬   
  
Agi: Well...we're gonna do...THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT!   
  
Yusuke: Isn't that that movie about the three kids from Blair that get lost in the woods while doing a project and get attacked by a witch?   
  
Agi: No...it's about three kids from WITCH that get lost in the woods while doing a BLAIR and get attacked by a PROJECT. Does that clear things up?   
  
Yusuke: O.o........   
  
Kurama: But there's four of us...   
  
Agi: Oh well. 3...4...same thing. They both come after 5.   
  
All: .......   
  
Agi: Ok let's see...first you guys have to get lost in the woods.   
  
Hiei: I thought we were already lost in the woods...   
  
Agi: Huh? Oh. No. This is just my bathroom.   
  
Yusuke: You grow trees in your bathroom?   
  
Agi: No...that's just the ten foot tall stalk of fungus that's been growing in the sink for twelve years.   
  
All: O_o   
  
Kurama: ...why?   
  
Agi: Because I can't fit the lawn mower through the door ^^;;;;   
  
All: -___-;;   
  
Kuwabara: OH MY GOSH! I'M ON FIRE!!! *jumps into the toilet*   
  
All: ............   
  
Agi: Anyways, somebody's gotta be the camera person.   
  
Kuwabara: *climbs out of the toilet* Oooo! Me! Me! PICK ME~!!   
  
Agi: ...Fine. *hands Kuwabara the camera*   
  
Kuwabara: *inflates with joy*   
  
Agi: Now make sure you record EVERYTHING...   
  
Kuwabara: *nod nod*   
  
Agi: Ok...I'll leave you guys ALL ALONE now. *flies away*   
  
Yusuke: *points* How did she do that?   
  
Kurama: I think her mom was half helicopter.   
  
Yusuke: Ohhhhh...   
  
All: .........   
  
Kuwabara: So umm...now what?   
  
Hiei: I dunno about you guys, but I'm going home.   
  
Kurama: Good idea.   
  
All: *run around in circles*   
  
Yusuke: AHHH! We're back where we started from! Running around in a circle should have led us right out of here!   
  
Kurama: Well...since it appears we'll be stuck here for the rest of our lives, we better build a cheap, flimsy shelter.   
  
Yusuke: *reaches into his pocket* *pulls out a tent* How convenient!   
  
Kurama: Hey, you wouldn't happen to have any matches in there too, would you?   
  
Yusuke: *digs around in pocket* Nope. No matches, but I do have this campfire I've been saving for an emergency...   
  
All: O.o   
  
Yusuke: ^_^   
  
Kuwabara: ....now what?   
  
Hiei: Let's go to sleep.   
  
All: K.   
  
_ The next morning... _   
  
Kuwabara: *wakes up* *pulls a sock out of his mouth* Hey! What's the big idea?   
  
Hiei: You SNORE as loud as a DEMOLITION DERBY!   
  
Kuwabara: Huff huff...   
  
Yusuke: *steps outside* *GASP!* OH MY GOD! *points to a pile of rocks* WE'RE DOOMED!   
  
Kurama: *looks at the rocks* Wonder how they got there...   
  
Hiei: Maybe the rock fairy came and put them there to accent the lovely color of this tent.   
  
All: ..........   
  
Hiei: Or maybe some crazy witch person made them appear.   
  
Yusuke: Well, now that we know we're in grave danger...wanna take a walk?   
  
All: OK! ^___^   
  
_ 5 hours later... _   
  
Kuwabara: I'm tired. Let's stop and rest by these creepy looking trees.   
  
Yusuke: Hey look! There's scary stick dolls hanging from these trees!   
  
Kurama: Eek! Maybe we should run away all scared and stuff...   
  
All: *run away*   
  
A heroic knight: *rides up out of nowhere* HAVE ANY OF YOU SEEN A PRINCESS?!   
  
Hiei: Did you check the recycling bin?   
  
Knight: The recycling bin...? YES! OF COURSE! Why didn't I think of that earlier?! I'M COMING FOR YOU MY PRINCESS! *points in a random direction* TALLY-HO! *rides off*   
  
Kurama: That was...odd...   
  
_ 20 miles away... _   
  
Knight: *digs through the bin* PRINCESS! I've found you! ........WHO RECYCLED THE CLAM CHOWDER?!   
  
_ Anyway... _   
  
Yusuke: Look! We made it back to the tent!   
  
Kurama: Strange how we can find our way back here, but not out of this forest...   
  
Yusuke: Hey...isn't one of us supposed to die right around here in the plot somewhere?   
  
Hiei: I nominate Kuwabara!   
  
Kuwabara: I don't wanna die T_T   
  
Yusuke: Yeah, and then we find your remains in a bundle of sticks in the morning...   
  
All: Ewwww....   
  
Kurama: Hmm...I don't know about you guys, but I don't want to step in a pile of Kuwabara's vital organs as soon as I wake up.   
  
All: *nod nod*   
  
Yusuke: Alright, we won't kill anybody off then.   
  
Kuwabara: *holds hands up* PRAISE THE LORD! *gets struck by lightning*   
  
All: o_____o   
  
Kuwabara: x_x   
  
Yusuke: He's not dead is he?   
  
Kuwabara: *twitches violently*   
  
Hiei: Oh he's dead all right, those are just the nerve reflexes.   
  
Kuwabara: Shut up you little gnome! I am NOT dead!   
  
Hiei: *KICK*   
  
Kuwabara: x____x   
  
Kurama: Hey...did you guys hear something?   
  
All: *listen*   
  
Yusuke: There's something moving around in those bushes!   
  
Kuwabara: Let's kill it!   
  
All: *leap into the bushes with sticks bared*   
  
Yusuke: *points stick at a shadowy figure* Who are you?!   
  
Shadowy figure: *in a Swedish accent* I'm zee Blair Veetch, ya?   
  
All: .........   
  
Yusuke: Umm...who are you REALLY?   
  
Shadowy figure: Ugh...fine. *steps forward*   
  
Kuwabara: Hey! It's that guy! With the...creepy...ness.   
  
Karasu: Umm...yeah. .....KURAMA!!! *latches onto Kurama's arm*   
  
Kurama: *SHRIEK*   
  
Hiei: *beats Karasu with a stick* GET OFF HIM!   
  
Yusuke: So...what are YOU doing out here?   
  
Karasu: Why, I'm the Blair Witch! *poses*   
  
All: O____o   
  
Karasu: *sigh* It's a summer job. Please don't tell Toguro.   
  
Agi: *flies in* Hey guys! Did you have fun on your little adventure thing?   
  
All: NO.   
  
Agi: Good ^^ Well, I just came by to say that the government called, and is willing to offer large sums of money for your rare footage!   
  
All: YAY!   
  
Yusuke: We're rich!   
  
All: *dance around happily*   
  
Kuwabara: *pokes camera* Hey...how do you turn this thing on?   
  
All: ................   
  
  
  


THE END   
  
  
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And the moral of this story is to never recycle clam chowder. 


End file.
